Tag: Lessons from grandchildren

Bible, Christian blog, Christian faith, Christian Writer, Devotional thought, Jesus, The Word of God

BECOMING AS A CHILD

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My granddaughter is 2 and a half years old. She is growing up quickly and is developing her own little character. Sweet, gentle, caring, curious, and feisty at times. She is a delight to spend time with, a real joy – and I don’t think I am biased! She is so grown up that she has recently started to come to Nana’s house on her own, without her big brother who is now at school every day.

Play with me

What that does mean is that when she comes, everything else I was hoping to do that day will have to be put aside. ‘Play with me’ she will demand, and boldly walk away to where the toys are, expecting me to follow. It doesn’t enter her head that I might refuse to play with her. Of course I won’t! She knows that. I want to enjoy her company and if that means getting down to her level I will.

Lowering myself

And it might mean literally getting down to her level. Lowering my aging stiff body onto the carpeted floor, laying down and propping myself on an elbow, or sitting with my legs bent awkwardly beneath me. Getting low enough to engage with the lego, or the jigsaw, or the play cars, or the plastic food. I have to lower my expectations too, put aside my level of maturity and understanding, to be present with her in her imaginative games.

What use would it be to suggest a 1000-piece jigsaw, when she can only manage a 24 piece? What nonsense to suggest a complicated board game, when she can only just about play animal dominos? Those might be the things that I would prefer to do, but they are too adult for her. Becoming as a child means just that. I have to put aside my adult experience, knowledge and understanding, lower myself to be able to play her games and enjoy her company. I can teach her things as we play, but only things that are appropriate for her level of understanding.

Jesus blesses the children

I was thinking about this as I read Luke 18 : 15-17 recently. It is the passage where mothers bring their children to Jesus to be blessed and are turned away by the disciples. But Jesus won’t have it – He wants the children to come to Him. He wants to bless them and be in their company. We don’t know what He said, whether He laughed with them, played with them even. In Mark’s gospel we are told He took them in His arms and held them. (Mark 10:13-16) What a beautiful picture that is! I am sure He lowered Himself to their level somehow.

But it is what He said that resonated with me,

‘Let the little children come to Me and do not forbid them; for of such is the kingdom of God. Assuredly I say to you, whoever does not receive the kingdom of God as a little child will by no means enter it.’             Luke 18:16 -17 NKJV

In Matthew’s account He adds this,

‘Therefore, whoever humbles himself as this little child is the greatest in the kingdom of heaven.’ Matt 18:4 NKJV

Becoming as a child

When I think about how I have to adjust myself in order to get down to my granddaughter’s level, what Jesus said about being a part of His kingdom makes a lot of sense to me. He doesn’t want me to be childish, that is not what ‘becoming as a child’ means. He just wants me to follow His example. He who lowered Himself from heaven’s splendour to walk our sorry world. He who was willing to come down to our level, so that He could be in our company – for eternity.

Nothing compared to Him

When it comes to His kingdom, all that I think I know, however learned I am, is nothing compared to what He knows and wants to reveal to me. He wants to spend time with me, show me more of the things that are important for me to understand. That requires me to be willing to humble myself, to lower myself, to not rely on, or be proud of my own abilities and knowledge. To even put aside all the things I think I can do for Him. He wants me to have a child- like trust, that He knows better than I do, and that I am safe with Him. He might even want to change the way I think, alter the things I thought I knew. He has much to teach me.

Do I want to be ‘great in the kingdom of heaven’? I am not sure I even know what that looks like. But I do want to be pleasing to the King. I do want to spend quality time in His company. I do want to learn His ways above my own. If that means becoming as a child for that to happen, that seems a small price to pay.

Joy Margetts is a published author and blogger. Her books are works of Christian Historical fiction. Set in medieval Wales against the backdrop of Cistercian abbey life, they tell stories of faith, hope and God’s redemptive power.

She has also written two non-fiction devotionals. More information on Joy, and her books can be found here

The Healing
The Pilgrim
The Bride
The Stranger
Christ Illuminated, an advent devotional
Because of the cross: a lent devotional
Grief, Healing, The Word of God

A SNACK AND A SNUGGLE (LOVED AND HELD)

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Our 4 year old grandson has just started school full time, finishing at 3pm every day. It is a milestone in his life and we are very proud of him. He has coped very well – he was already doing part days – but school every day, all day, is a new and demanding routine for him. Inevitably, he is tired.

Photo of young boy walking away with a school bag on his back

When we picked him up from school the other day, he was so excited to see us, excited to be able to come to play at Nana’s house with his little sister. But within minutes of getting in the car he burst into tears, over something and nothing. It was obvious that in his tiredness he was just overwhelmed by all the emotions coursing through him.

‘Shall we have a snack and a snuggle?’ I suggested, when we got home. He sniffed and nodded. We put a favourite video on the TV, and had juice and biscuits and a cuddle on the sofa. After a little while he was happy and settled enough to go and find some toys and play with his grandad.

The unexpected overwhelm

Sometimes a surge of emotion hits us out of nowhere. We might be overtired, over stressed, triggered by the unexpected. Sometimes we might not even know why we are upset, why overwhelm threatens, and what makes us lose control. We want to cry, or scream, or lash out.

I am in a season of grief and loss. Lately I have been doing ‘well’. Life, with all it’s blessings (grandchildren included) has been good. The grief moments have been less, in both frequency and intensity. But last week was my late Dad’s birthday, the first one we have faced without him. I thought I might feel sad on that day, but the unexpected wave of grief I experienced, surprised and threatened to overwhelm me. The dam broke – there haven’t been many tears lately – and it seemed they weren’t going to be held back. The more I cried, the more tears came, along with memories both good and bad.

Let me wrap you in My arms…

I have a Father in heaven. Yes, my earthly father is there, but I also have a perfect heavenly Father. And He knows me so intimately. He knew why the tears came that day, He wasn’t surprised by my messy grief. He well understands loss, grief and pain. He weeps for my tears. He reminded me of all this as I poured out my heart to Him. His response was a whispered, ‘Let me wrap you in My arms, today. Let Me hold you.’

A snack and a snuggle?

God knew that all I needed was to feel loved and held. I didn’t need answers. I didn’t need to be told to pull myself together and stop the silliness. I just needed to rest back into His embrace. He fed me – taking me to verses in scripture that reminded me of my value to Him. And then through the words of a song that just happened to be playing, He reassured me that He loved me, in ways that my heart needed to hear. I wrapped myself in a soft blanket and sat imagining Him holding me. His peace descended and I knew He was there for me. I felt comforted, strengthened, and able to face the rest of the day.

Image shows three sparrows, two resting on twigs and the third in flight, with the words 'you are of more value that many sparrows' .

Loved and held

We knew instinctively what my overtired grandson needed – he just needed to be reassured, loved and held for a little while. God, our Father wants to do the same for us, if we will let Him. If we will come to Him in our vulnerability, just seeking His presence and not expecting Him to answer, heal, or act. He invites us to come to Him, in our messiness, and find a place of rest, in His more than capable arms.

Joy Margetts is a published author and blogger. Her books are works of Christian Historical fiction. Set in medieval Wales against the backdrop of Cistercian abbey life, they tell stories of faith, hope and God’s redemptive power. Her debut novel ‘The Healing‘ was published by Instant Apostle on 19 March 2021.

‘The Pilgrim‘, her second full length novel, was published by Instant Apostle on 22 July 2022, and her third novel, ‘The Bride‘, published on 20th October 2023. ‘The Stranger‘, her fourth full length novel was published 22 November 2024 by Broad Place Publishing.

Her first non-fiction book, an Advent Devotional, ‘Christ Illuminated‘ was published in September 2023 and her latest 40 day devotional, ‘Because of the Cross‘ was published 7 February 2025

More information on Joy, and her books can be found here

Devotional thought

God’s Embrace

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Grandchildren are the best

It is such a privilege to be able to care for my grandchildren. I know we are blessed to have them living close by, and to be a part of their young lives. I don’t take it for granted. It is a real joy to have them in our home, to lavish love on them, to have fun, to even do the mundane things together, and the difficult things. Like nap time. Nap time doesn’t always go smoothly. In fact sometimes it can be a bit of a challenge.

My eighteen month old granddaughter hasn’t been coming to us for long. Her mum didn’t go back to work after having her, so we weren’t needed so early in her young life. Over the last three weeks we have trialed having her for full days with her brother, and it has gone generally well. With our grandson we had ‘cracked’ nap time; we had a little routine of stories, milk and cuddles, and he inevitably settled without much trouble. He now no longer even needs a nap. But his sister does.

Photo of a small child playing in the garden

The first two weeks went actually surprisingly well, but this last week was not so smooth. She objected to everything and there were lots of tears. Now I am generally the one who does the ‘settling to sleep’. I am also the one who does the nappy changes, the meal prep and the telling what to do. Grandad is the fun one who mostly just plays with them! And our granddaughter loves her Grandad and always reaches for him first. So as she is crying because she is tired and yet refusing to sleep, she decides that Nanna just won’t do. Grandad is all she wants.

Close to tears

I admit that in this instance I found that really difficult. Already feeling emotionally fragile because of other things happening in my life, this Nanna found herself close to tears, as her beloved granddaughter rejected her cuddles and chose Grandad instead. It was probably an overreaction – later in the day she played quite happily with me, smiling and laughing. But just in that moment I felt hurt, and that I wasn’t enough for her.

Sharing about this with a dear and very wise friend, she immediately said,

 ‘You’ve got a blog there. How do you think God feels when we go to other things or people instead of Him?’

She was right, on both counts. Here is the blog!

God’s Embrace

I took time to meditate on what she said, and it challenged me deeply. Even in  my  current season, when I have sometimes felt overwhelmed, upset and confused, where have I gone to for comfort? Food? Social Media? TV? I know my weaknesses!

It is not that those things are necessarily bad in and of themselves, but there is One who loves me passionately, who has all the comfort I need. Who is standing there with His arms wide open waiting for me to come into His embrace. Instead I go elsewhere, until finally I realise that the arms I have rejected are the ones I need the most. How often have I hurt God by choosing not to accept His embrace? How many times must I learn that those other things are just distractions, and that His voice, His Word, He Himself are my real places of refuge.

Now I am not God, and my husband is not comfort food! But, yet again, God has spoken to me  about my relationship with Him through the antics of my grandchildren. It is incredible how they are teaching me. How I see in our time spent together powerful representations of how my heavenly father wants me to be with Him. Childlike, trusting, accepting of His loving embrace.

Image shows the text of Psalm 131

Joy Margetts is a published author and blogger. Her books are works of Christian Historical fiction. Set in medieval Wales against the backdrop of Cistercian abbey life, they tell stories of faith, hope and God’s redemptive power. Her debut novel ‘The Healing‘ was published by Instant Apostle on 19 March 2021.

‘The Pilgrim‘, her second full length novel, was published by Instant Apostle on 22 July 2022, and her third novel, ‘The Bride‘, published on 20th October 2023. Her first non-fiction book, an Advent Devotional, ‘Christ Illuminated‘ was published in September 2023.

‘The Stranger‘, her fourth full length novel is coming soon! Due for publication November 2024

More information on Joy, and her books can be found here

Bible, Christian faith, Christian Writer, Devotional thought, The Word of God

KISSES THAT MAKE IT BETTER

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My grandson is 3 now, and growing up fast in many ways. It is precious to see that he is still trusting and that life hasn’t yet stolen his innocence from him. He is a mostly quiet and calm child. His play is generally creative and imaginative. But just every now and then he reminds us that he is a boy, with energy in abundance. He will hurtle around the room, or throw things or jump on the furniture, or engage in play fighting. Inevitably this sometimes ends with him hurting himself. A bruised knee or bumped head, a cut or a scrape.

KISSES MAKE IT BETTER

Adorably, when this happens he will come to find me, or his mum or dad, point out the injured area and ask for a kiss to make it better. Invariably, even when there have been tears, a small loving kiss planted on the knee, elbow, head or finger seems to do the job. It makes it better. The tears stop and he is off playing again.

Image shows a photograph of a mother kissing the forehead of a small girl.
Image Courtesy of Canva (Pixabay)

I was thinking about this when God reminded me of a verse in a not often preached about book of the Bible. Song of Solomon is a beautiful piece of poetry, written by an ancient King of Israel, using imagery that is hard for the modern reader to make sense of. But it is so obviously a love song.

GOD’S LOVE SONG

Many believe it is in the Bible to serve as a allegory of the love that Christ, the Bridegroom, has for His Bride, the Church. But I have learned to make the message of that particular love poem personal to me. I even wrote a whole novel based on the way that little book expresses the devoted love that God has for each one of us.

Song of Solomon 1: 2 (NKJV) says this:

Let him kiss me with the kisses of his mouth—For your (His) love is better than wine.

What does that mean? Well, along with many commentators I believe that the ‘kisses of his mouth’ are referring to His words. The kisses God has for us can be found in what He has to say to us. And God has spoken primarily to us through His Word, the Bible. Now I know that this isn’t the only way that God speaks to us, but it is the main way. Even when we think we have heard God speak in other ways we always need to test what we have heard against the truth of His written word. His words are so full of love and encouragement.

KISSES THAT MAKE IT BETTER?

Kisses from God’s mouth make it better? Yes. My testimony is just that. For some time now I have lived with a condition that limits my physical abilities and restricts my energy. I have had times where I have felt emotionally bombarded, and anxiety and fear have threatened to take hold.

Like many people, life also has its challenges beyond just my personal ones. Family, friends, circumstances, even the things happening in the world around me. Loss, broken relationships, the pain my loved ones are having to go through. All these things have the power to hurt or wound me. But I have found that the Kisses of His mouth have the power to make it better.

Image shows a photograph of an open Bible resting on the corner of a balcony rail, with a misted out landscape behind it, all bathed in bright sunlight.
Image courtesy of Canva

HIS LIFE- BREATHED WORDS

When I am struggling, hurting, confused, fearful, lacking in strength, I have learnt to go to the Bible. I go to His life-breathed Word. I open my heart and I open my spiritual ears, and as I read scripture I can feel His life breath restoring me. Sometimes what I read speaks directly to the way I am feeling, and immediately offers its healing balm. Other times, the words on the page don’t seem to have anything to do with what I am going through. But still, in reading them, I feel strengthened and encouraged. I am reminded over and over again of how great God is, how powerful He is, how interested He is in me, and most importantly how much He loves me.

At a time in my life when I could not find healing anywhere else, I turned to His Word and He met me there. His kisses made it better.

LOVE KISSES MAKE IT BETTER

Now my grandson wouldn’t go to just anyone to ask for his healing kisses. He goes to someone that he knows loves him, that he trusts, someone who won’t laugh at him or turn him away. God doesn’t want us to look to ‘wine’ (the pleasures of this world) when His love for us is a much safer thing for us. Those things might numb the pain we are feeling, but His words have the power to heal us deeply.

When you are hurting, can I encourage you to turn to the One who loves you
so much that He sent His Son to die on the cross for you? Bring your hurts to
Him. He is trustworthy. He knows everything about you and He cares about your
pain. He has the power to heal your hurts, and is waiting to make them better.

And He has graciously provided us with a whole book full of His love kisses.
Let him smother me with kisses—his Spirit-kiss divine. So kind are your caresses, I drink them in like the sweetest wine! Song of Solomon 1:2 The Passion Translation

Joy Margetts is a published author and blogger. Her books are works of Christian Historical fiction. Set in medieval Wales against the backdrop of Cistercian abbey life, they tell stories of faith, hope and God’s redemptive power. Her debut novel ‘The Healing‘ was published by Instant Apostle on 19 March 2021.

‘The Pilgrim‘, her second full length novel, was published by Instant Apostle on 22 July 2022, and her third novel, ‘The Bride‘, published on 20th October 2023. Her first non-fiction book, an Advent Devotional, ‘Christ Illuminated‘ was published in September 2023.

More information on Joy, and her books can be found here